I don't know if any of you are keeping an eye or ear on this developing situation, but Fred and I can hardly pull ourselves away from the news and TV to attend to our regular duties around here. We have been listening to the broadcasts from F.E.M.A. aka Federal Elf Monitoring Agency. The situation is growing mighty serious.
Jingle bells have been spotted throughout our town, both large and small, and silver and gold. A Large troop of red hatted elves has been seen travelling east of E-burg and heading in a southwesterly direction. Children everywhere are scrambling to behave or at least appear that way. Chatter has been detected from the North Pole region communications. Long range scanners have picked up enough intercepted correspondence to move to a yellow alert condition -meaning-high probability of north pole visitation within the next week. A small but distinctly red light was scene leading an unidentified airborne craft, flying much lower than normal air traffic.
Ladies and Gentlemen if I'm not mistaken we are about to move our nation to Elfcon 1. Hope you are all prepared.