Normally if this were like other years, my whole family would be at the March on Washington in D.C. This year we weren't. Fred has not seen a doctor in almost 20 years for anything other than stitches and glue. And even those ER trips have been blissfully sparse. After spending so much time on making sure our kids were doing well,I decided it was time to make sure their father was OK too.
Or basic upkeep.
So, I had to nudge him pretty hard. Finally and mostly, because he wanted me to stop bugging him, he agreed to go see a G.P. Naturally she ordered a whole load of tests, and blood work, and X-rays and labs. We've been running around town for the last week or two checking them all off the list. Today was his final test, requiring a bit of sedation. After drinking a few vials of explosives, Andrew, Fred, and I headed out in the early hours of the morning, leaving Peter and JP to play the roles of Mom and Dad for the better part of the morning.
Warning! Anesthesia will impair your judgement and perception for the remainder of the day...
Almost on cue, Fred chose that moment to open his eyes, smile softly, and say "Ellie- You look beautiful". Naturally- I chuckled and informed him his judgement was clearly impaired before he closed his eyes again to rest. Every one of his tests came out perfect. He is the picture of health. (Thank you Jesus!) I gathered him together, and Andrew and I drove him home stopping at Red Robin to celebrate his first taste of food in two days.
The thought occurred to me later on today, that drugs aren't the only things that impair our judgement. Love does as well. It washes away what is really there and leaves in its place years of memories to view each other through. They become the real lens of how we see one another. The rough spots forgotten, the gentleness and happiness our vision. We share a perspective on the world that is our own. We have walked it together and therefore can see what no one else can. I am so happy to know he is healthy and well and mine. I am happy that when we look at one another, neither of us can see what the rest of the world does. Time and age have no place in how we remember each other- the heart and soul which have a different memory to draw from, triumph over that 'reality' gently washing away wrinkles, and grey hair, and weight gain and years of hard work and aging from the picture. Our vision has been mutually impaired by our marriage and we are all the better for it.