I am really looking forward to Ash Wednesday. Unlike the nursery rhyme "ashes, ashes, we all fall down!"- Lent isn’t about the bubonic plague for me. It’s a beginning. A chance to start over. God is pretty smart to give me 40 days of it too. If He gave me a simple week or two, I’d never really get into any decent habits that might eventually take. Hey, let me be honest- I’m Catholic and I LIKE being Catholic. I know that isn’t the most popular thing now-a-days with all the different serious troubles facing the church, but I actually believe that whole “if you deny me , I will deny you” so there I said it, I Love Jesus ( or am trying to) And yeah, sure I agree- it’s hard. I mean really hard- think of issues like birth control, divorce, abortion and you get an idea this belief system is not for lightweights. But Catholicism is also filled with all sorts of wonderful times and traditions and it is inherently beautiful.
My friend Paige is a convert from Anglicanism and asks me all kinds of questions about these little mini traditions like Ashes and throat blessings, St Joseph the Realtor, and The Lost and Found Saint, that cradle Catholics all know about but maybe forget just why we do the things we do. She calls these ‘the extras’. She’ll halt her kids on the way into mass for the holy water pit stop and whispers “hey don’t forget the extras!” She’s right. The Catholic extras are great.
Lent is about penance, but of course most of us take a negative view of penance. We think ‘no meat, no fun’ and sign ourselves up for the dirt eating club and get that seriously somber look on our faces. We feel about Lent about the same way I feel about washing my windows after winter. Drudgery maybe, but boy -things brighten up once the job is done.( I just wish I could pay someone else to do it.) The truth is this season in the life of the church, is just about my favorite. I am forced to really take a look at myself and decide what interior projects I feel up to taking on. Where could I really use some growth?
Being an all or nothing type, I usually do things that will really give me a big bang for my buck. I tend to crack myself up at my first attempt. When I lived in Vermont and had 4 small children I decided one year for Lent I’d go to daily mass for 40 days. If you could have seen how disorganized I was at the time you would have realized how enormous a feat this was for me. I could barely find time for dressing the children in those days and I wanted to attempt daily mass. “It’s just 40 days!” I remembered telling myself after the second day in. Well, six kids and 7 years later I cannot imagine life without daily mass. And I assure you it took every bit of those first 40 days to get that habit down!
This year I am going to try to refine my intercessory prayer skills. You know instead of just saying “I’ll pray for you” in a whispery pious voice that exudes holiness-I’d actually like to remember to get down on my knees and just do it. No generic ‘for all those who asked for prayers’ any more at the front of the rosary. This is important to me.
I want to be able to picture the face, and really try to connect, for even a moment, with the request. Why is someone asking for this prayer? Why do they feel the need to reach outside of themselves to get help from above? What is weighing on their hearts that I can ease in some form even if it’s by letting them know they are not alone- that I care. In the darkest hours of my life Jesus has always been there for me- always, ever since I was a little kid I could rely on Him. It is an enormous comfort to me to know that even if all else goes south He doesn’t leave me- or stop loving me. He never leaves. The thought of conforming myself to be just a little more like Him in this, is so appealing. To know that a friend or better still, an enemy could ask me to pray and that I would genuinely want for their good and make their cares my own seem like an area I could really use a little reform.
So, this Lent if at any time you need a prayer said- I’m here. Or at least I am trying to be. If you’d like you can write to me here (or privately) or just ask for prayers for a special intention and I promise I will do my best to remain with you in that. No request is too big or too small. I will not ask Jesus for anything for myself for the next 40 days (and I tend to ask for a lot) without first bringing all other requests to Him. Paige is so right. The extras are terrific. Who knows in forty days there might just be a little less of me in here and a little more of Him.
A Catholic girl can hope can’t she?
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