St. Valentine

Valentine was a holy priest in Rome, who, with St. Marius and his family, assisted the martyrs in the persecution under Claudius II. He was apprehended, and sent by the emperor to the prefect of Rome, who, on finding all his promises to make him renounce his faith in effectual, commended him to be beaten with clubs, and afterwards, to be beheaded, which was executed on February 14, about the year 270.

I have ambiguous feelings about St Valentine’s Day. On the one hand, who doesn’t enjoy chocolate, flowers, and a reminder from a loved one of how special you are to them? On the other hand, I hate that Valentine’s Day has become a commercial animal for retailers to exploit. A high holy day for jewelers, florists, and Godiva. Every place you go hearts abound and all kinds of paraphernalia that really doesn’t have anything at all to do with Valentine or love.

I am not very good at remembering dates or anniversaries or birthday’s. Never have been, likely never will be. In fact one of my dreaded fears is forgetting one of my childrens' birthdays and scarring them for life. Thank God for a husband who remembers dates. (True story: I once went to a doctor’s office when Joseph was little and had the receptionist ask me his birthday. I hemmed and hawed and guessed 3 different and incorrect dates until she asked me if he was really my kid. I burst out laughing and so did she which then jarred my memory into releasing the correct date.) 

I know too many women who really wait to see if their husband will remember ‘special dates’ as a sign of their undying love and devotion. Not me. In the early years of our marriage I made a promise to Fred I would not ever be angry with him if he forgot a date, so long as he wouldn’t be angry with me if I forgot one either. I also told him if I knew there was some special date coming up ( i.e. our eleventy-first wedding anniversary) I would remind him instead of waiting until the date passed and then throwing a hissy fit. But I have heard tales that suggest I am underrepresented in these sentiments. Some women actually use it as a manipulation tactic. Wow. How cruel. (And they wonder why their husbands don’t show much in the way of love and devotion!?)

However, I do really like reasons to celebrate even small occasions with my family, and it’s especially nice to do so after a long winter that has had cooped us all up. So, I have asked Fred if we can fore-go the usual date night to share the evening with our kids. Peter and John Paul will cook an Italian dinner. I’ll encourage some card making and gratitude (always a scarcity among multiple siblings) and after dessert I think we’ll call it game night. Watch out Andy I will rule the world in RISK! 

Hope all of you feel loved today, not because Hallmark says so, but because you truly are worthy of love. Just in case no one else is around you to say it: Happy Valentine’s Day! Consider yourself hugged.