The 3 older boys went to a Lock-In with their youth group last night. This entails staying up all night and listening to peer talks on God and morality, playing games, and eating pizza until you're stuffed.That sounds like a full weekend doesn't it? Not quite enough for my second son Peter.Last week I told you Peter had a new girlfriend. Tonight I met her, (and her Mom!). Peter asked if he could make dinner for Lauren. I kinda love that he asked that. For years now I have been teaching my boys to cook. Andrew can do all things breakfast related, but wants nothing much to do with it after that. Peter, John Paul, and Matty on the other hand love to cook. One of the comments I always made when teaching them why it was good to learn to cook was that someday they might need to feed themselves OR someday they might like a girl, and it would be awful nice to be able to cook her dinner! Peter remembered that little gem. Lauren is a new driver and since you've already read my post on my heart walking out the door with Andy and the car, it was no surprise when she asked if her Mom could come along since it was a long drive (about an hour).
Peter made his famous Chicken Marsala and it was delish! Lauren and her Mom Miriam arrived promptly and the house felt like we were welcoming old friends. Honestly, with 10 kids milling around it would be really difficult to not keep up the conversation, but Miriam was really easy to talk to and Lauren is polite and pretty with a smile that lights up the room. She even offered to play the guitar for us after dinner. She has taught herself most of what she knows and my little girls danced around the room while she strummed out some tunes. Since Fred and I got along so well with her Mom, we're thinking of setting it up as a new policy for all our boys-
Dear Sons, From here on in, please bring your girlfriend and her Mom over for 3 hours of observation time.Dinner will be served. (As a matter of fact, you'll be cooking it.) Thank you, Your Parents
Quite honestly, there might be huge wisdom in this. I cannot begin to tell you how nice it is to see a family instead of just a person. It seemed so much more natural an environment in many ways,and I am sure it had to be nice for the 2 of them to have each other in the midst of our crowd.I guess it shouldn't surprise me that we all seemed to be on the same page.(Dad and younger brother were away for an overnight, so well have to check them out at a later date!)
In any case, the evening was a success and Peter seems super happy- and super sleepy!
Today one of my sons posted a status on his Facebook wall saying he was tired of reading complaints, and song lyrics and that he didn't want to be friends with folks who do that. I am not trying to point out this particular son tonight, as I have read about 43,567,676 similar complaints since joining Facebook. (That was forty-three million, five hundred-and-sixty seven-thousand, six-hundred and seventy-six complaints for those of you who thought I randomly hit some keys).
There are lots of people who complain about Facebook and other social utilities. And granted they can be both a good and a bad thing at different times. Here's the thing though- they're not all bad. And to be really honest, it shows how difficult it can really be for some people to start a simple conversation with others. Not everyone seems to have a whole lot of social grace. You know, that ability to say interesting or witty things on a moments notice, to know their place and also know others in the pecking order in life.They don't seem to know how to 'do it' correctly, so instead they blurt out something stupid or foolish or silly, and everyone that hears it, behaves accordingly. Only a few people I meet in the world are fascinating and the rest, well they're OK too- but you may just have to work a bit harder to get to know them. And of course that work is generally worthwhile.
In fact, I don't find Facebook must different than I find the real world. Some people are engaging, some people are not, some people have foul mouths, and some people do not, some people have strong political ideas, and some people do not,and some people complain- allll the way hommmmme!
( did you see the little piggy reference coming? me neither.)
In any case, my 'friend' list appropriately reflects all that. I have taught my boys that they can stay connected to friends on Facebook, but not to replace real life interaction with it whenever possible. I actually enjoy some aspects of Facebook and wish it would carry over to the 'real world' (as if people chatting on line are suddenly not real? hmmmm? still trying to figure that one out?) Can you for instance imagine:
being at a party and having a relative you know is embarrassing walk up and be able to simply 'hide' them?
How'd you like to get rid of a nuisance person in your real life by simply 'unfriending them'
If only I had the 'delete post' option for some tedious conversations I have been forced to sit through in my day!
For those of you out there who are also 'vocally challenged' (I cannot sing a lick), isn't it nice to post the lyrics to a song or the video and have people actually THANK YOU for sharing it?
That last one could never happen in my 'real world'. Is it a time waster? Can be. Do you sometimes hear more than you'd like? uh-huh. Can you be so silly that you get lost in it and think over what someone else says way too much- yes- but that happens in 'real life' too. We all bring our own troubles to the game and that affects the way we play it.
*UPDATED* After initial publication, my wonderful and significantly more thoughtful cousin Monica pointed out that for many teenagers today cyber-bullying is a problem. As a homeschooling family we haven't really encountered that aspect so far, and so it wasn't really 'on the radar' as I wrote. I am glad she pointed out that in certain cases the above behaviors such as 'unfriending'' people can be abused and cause real damage. I don't know all that much about cyber bullying, but I've heard a few horror stories and can imagine how painful it might be. Thanks Monica for the heads-up!
Has it the potential to also keep you connected to fun, vibrant, people with different ideas- many times with people who are miles and miles away? Yes! I can think of a million ways having a few friends connected to you on a social utility might be simply terrific, and is.
Lastly, when I was a little girl I had an Aunt Betty and Uncle Charlie who were 'shut-ins'.( little prayer here for their souls- thanks) That's a strange phrase isn't it? They weren't reclusive but because of ill health, became shut-in to their own home. My Mom would make us go visit my Aunt Betty a few times every year and she would always make comments like "Poor Betty, she doesn't see anyone except a few times a year and she was always so social."
That always made me so sad to think of. She wanted to get out and engage the world, but simply could not. As I grew older I realized there was a whole army of shut-ins as I heard the term in every parish. There are always good souls who go and visit the shut-ins and keep them connected to life. While I don't imagine we could get all those elderly shut-ins to start using Facebook, I do think we have the ability to keep this younger generation from ever being totally shut-in. The 'world' has been at their fingertips since they were born, and that can be a good thing.
So, I'll leave you with one last thought, and to do so I'll use a few lyrics that in the 'real world' I could never sing for you, or even find on an iPod before the moment had passed, but through the magic of technology I am able to send to all of you- my friends- on Facebook and elsewhere in our little fake world. ( you'll thank me later!).
Well, I just finished reading my first book on a kindle. It's not mine. John-Paul asked for it this Christmas, and since he is an avid reader, it made sense. I am not a big fan of the concept. I like books. I like the feel of them in my hands. I like to turn pages. I like the weight of them. I like the paper and the ink and the typeset and the absolute world they transport you into once the first crack comes.
But I was checking out John-Paul's 'reading device' (or maybe we should just call it his portable bookstore) and I found a title I liked and it was actually cheaper then the real thing, so I bought it- and downloaded it- and began to read it- in under 20 seconds. No check--out lines, no paperback versus hard copy decision making required. It was here in seconds.
So, I read all the useful information and I got accustomed to this new experience, but I really didn't like it. And I probably will only do it by force from now on. I had no sense of closure when I was done. I couldn't flip back to my favorite passages and read aloud to Freddy for a few moments. It just wasn't the same to have a cup of tea and curl up with an electronic reading device. There was nothing cozy about it. I sorta felt like a traitor. I couldn't rest it on a shelf with the proud knowledge "I had read that'. Something inside said I had betrayed the 'real' book industry by taking this easy way out. Its almost sinful ( but in a venial way.)
Random thoughts are presenting themselves to me once again today. Since this seemed to please you all so much last time, I figured I'd let you in on them once again. Here goes:
Today I was forced to consider a world without Twinkies. Hostess is having difficulty pulling itself out of bankruptcy. As if it wasn't bad enough that Greece was spreading her errors throughout Europe, now the contagion is affecting my baked goods.
Fred has a simple policy lately for choosing a Presidential candidate. He has decided NOT TO VOTE for any candidate whose name resembles an ice-cream flavor. "I'll have a Mitt Romney please!" That reality is simply chilling ( no pun intended). My husband is so wise.
Those cute little Valentine hearts we should be seeing ANY DAY now in stores known as 'Conversation Hearts' which have all sorts of great messages on them- don't contain nearly enough sugar to qualify as real candy. Lets boycott them.
Why is it that Clark Kent's parents cannot recognize him without glasses? WORST DISGUISE EVER in my opinion.
I am the the holder of a Red Royalty card Ladies and Gentlemen- and I intend to use it. In case you are not aware of what a Red Royalty card is- I'll let you in on my little secret. Every time I visit the AWESOME RED ROBIN, they punch my card for every burger I purchase, and when I get to ten I get a FREE AWESOME BURGER! Move over coffee club, you look pathetic next to my Red Royalty card! (Did you really think I could do a random post without mentioning Red Robin? Really???)
I do my best writing while I am actually running on my treadmill.
